E You live, you fail, you die
by TalynSlytherin
Summary: Draco is desperately trying to cope with his new life. Having to deal with with a horrible curse, a new position and nasty students isn't making matters any easier ..
1. Prologue

_Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended_.__

Thanks to Nykohl, the best beta ever! And thanks to my german readers, who always push me to my limits. I am writing as fast as I can, believe me!

***

I would have never thought it would be me looking toward a doubtful future – I mean, me, of all people!  And there is now a little voice in my head, saying, _Be honest with yourself, Malfoy, you didn't really think about ANYTHING at all.  _I try to ignore that voice, but it's right. 

Honesty. You can't expect honesty from me at all, after all, I'm a _Slytherin_, and no one EVER expects something like _that_ from us!

But then, there is that voice that whispers maliciously, _They didn't expect stupidity from you, either.___

And again, it's right. That's what I had been – stupid. A complete idiot.

Why had I been on Voldemort's side? Easy question. Because my father wanted me to be. All my life, I blindly did everything he wanted me to. As far back as I can remember, I always knew the consequences if I didn't – a broken arm _at the least_. He always had a fascination with the _Cruciatus curse, _too.  Mother never did anything to prevent that, and I thought she didn't because she was too afraid of him. Now I know that couldn't be any farther from the truth, but that's for later.

When did I finally notice that I didn't want to be a Death Eater, nor have anything to do with the Dark Lord?  It was when he discovered that Severus Snape, my house teacher and Potions master, was a spy for Dumbledore. Did he torture him?  He did worse.  It was a shock for me to see such maliciousness to a person who was one of the people whom I really liked. Suddenly, I just wanted out, out of the war, out of Voldemort's claws. 

It was clear to me then.  Dumbledore and the Order of Phoenix knew that I carried the Dark Mark on my arm, therefore, there was only one thing I could do – I went to that crazy old man and offered myself as a spy. Don't ask me how I felt – I was terrified. I didn't wanted to end up like Severus; that simple thought made me want to be sick, but there was no other way. I hated Voldemort for what he did to Severus, my godfather and – save for my mother – the only person I trusted.

I don't know what Dumbledore saw in my eyes, but it was enough for him to trust me.

And you know the irony? That's exactly why I'm here right now. _Here _is St. Mungo's, and no one knows what's wrong with me. Unfortunately, I know myself, but I won't tell. There is a reason not to.

The last great battle. I killed my own father, and it still makes me sick to think about it. Not because it was my father, but because I swore to myself never to kill a human being. Do you think I am a hypocrite for saying that? I don't give a fucking damn, it's the truth, believe it or not. Father finally realized that I was the 'new mole', and he was infuriated. It was him or I, and I decided to live a little bit longer.

Oops. BIG mistake. Voldemort caught me with my wand raised over father's dead body. Outside, the battle was continuing, I could absently hear the screams of the surviving members of the Order of Phoenix, but my eyes saw only the Dark Lord. He was so fast, I could't even react. He hexed me with a spell called _Infinitus Flamma,_ endless flame, and since then, it feels as if my whole body is burning in a living hellfire. But – that isn't all, is it?

"_EVEN _if you survive, young _master _Malfoy," the creature spit in my face, hissing, his red eyes staring holes into my grey ones, "do remember. Telling somebody about the curse will cause your pain to double. And it will double with every person you tell after that. Someday, you will succumb to the pain, and I will await you after that."

Did I believe him? I don't know for sure if Voldemort is telling the truth or not, but I don't want to risk doubling this pain

Voldemort, of course, was killed by Harry Potter, but I didn't see it. I fell into unconsciousness after the Dark Lord finished with me.

My memory started again when I woke up in St. Mungos.


	2. New Trouble

Hell couldn't have been any worse.

Draco awoke, and he flinched as his muscles screamed in pain. The last thing he remembered was Voldemort's evil face, his mouth spitting menace at him.  He tried to make out his location; it was a hospital room, but it wasn't in the Hogwarts' infirmary. 

He gritted his teeth as he moved his arms. The burning pain was still there.

"You are awake." The cold, emotionless voice came from his right, and he turned his head.

"Mother." Despite the pain, he straightened.

Narcissa Malfoy's stare was as icy as her voice.

"You _dare_ to call me that? The mighty hero who _murdered_ his own father?"

"Mother!" Draco was taken aback.

"How could you? How _could _you, Draco? You switched sides, you spat on the Malfoy family honour – and to top it off, you killed your own flesh and blood. I _despise _you. You make me _sick_.  I can't prevent you from getting your half of the inheritance, but remember, Draco, the money in your hands will be bloody!"

Draco still wasn't able to say anything. He couldn't even _think _of something to say. Finally, he tried.

"Mum …" he said again, and was silenced by her hand, slapping his face.

"Don't call me that, Draco. Never again!" she hissed nastily. "If you ever come near me or the Manor again, you will know real pain, do you understand? You are not my son anymore!"

She turned and stormed off the room.

"Mother, wait, please …"

He completely forgot about the curse, and while trying to run after her, his legs gave out and he landed with a hard thump on the floor. The pain heightened, and he bit his lip unintentionally. 

The door slammed shut, and Draco sat on the floor, a small flow of blood trickling down his chin, staring numbly at the spot where his mother had been seconds ago.   

_I am a Malfoy and a Slytherin. We do not cry, so don't you even think about starting!_

But to his utter shock, he felt something warm and wet dripping down his cheeks. Draco grabbed blindly at the sheets and pressed them to his eyes.

He had been so sure to have Narcissa on his side. He couldn't have ever imagined how wrong he was.

***

Two hours later, he had managed to scramble his senses together, and was now playing a role that would have made any actor proud.

Draco answered every question about his condition with a bored and unnerved voice. _There's n__othing wrong with me. Let me out. I'm fine, thank you._ Nobody was able to see behind his façade, and that was the way he wanted it to be. He could still hear Voldemort hissing the doubling effect of the _Infinitus Flamma._ He wouldn't risk it, he had to find out for sure before he did anything rash.

Draco couldn't find any solution here at St Mungo's, so he started to question what happened after he was left unconscious. 

Potter was once again the mighty hero of the wizarding world. Despite everything, the pain, his mother, Voldemort's curse … he felt relieved. Voldemort was dead, Lucius was dead, and he was free as a bird.

He started to think about his future, and he thought hard. What would his future bring? He wasn't prepared to think about finding work, and considering the Malfoy inheritance, he wasn't forced to. But – just hanging around, suffering from the pain he was feeling deep inside his guts? Not the best way to go about things.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.

Draco frowned. He couldn't think of anyone who would want to visit him. His former "friends" were either dead or in prison, Snape wasn't able to wander around and make visits, his mother made it very clear that she wasn't going to come back again … so, who else could it be?

_Maybe it's the almighty Potter _he sneered.

"Come in."

It was Dumbledore, and the blue eyes behind the glasses looked friendly towards the former Slytherin.

"Mr Malfoy. I am glad you survived your encounter with Lord Voldemort."

"Sir."

Draco eyed him without any emotion. But the old man was quite used to staring contests, and Draco finally gave up and looked at his sheets.

Dumbledore kept analysing him, though, and it unnerved him.

"Do you remember anything? Kingsley Shacklebolt and young Miss Tonks found you, lying on the ground, unconscious, with your father next to you. The Healers hadn't found any injuries. What went on between you and Voldemort?"

Draco opened his mouth.

Even if you survive, young master Malfoy, do remember. Telling somebody about the curse will cause your pain to double. And it will double with every person you tell after that. Someday, you will succumb to the pain, and I will await you after that.

"I don't remember. It's all blank … Sir."

"Are you sure?"

No. But I don't trust that you have a solution.  I'll go mad if this gets any worse.

"Yes."

Dumbledore continued to stare at the blonde boy. Then he sighed and changed the topic.

"There is another reason why I am here. You know Hogwarts is still without a potion master?"

"How is Severus?" the ex-Slytherin asked involuntarily. 

"He is better, but not quite well enough. I have come to offer you his position, Mr Malfoy, for a time period of one year."

"What? I mean … why me?"

"You _know_ potions, you gave your housemates extra-lessons, you were always able to have your eyes everywhere, and perhaps the most important, Severus wants you to get it."

"But I haven't any idea how to teach. Isn't that important, too?"

"Why don't you at least give it a try?" Dumbledore suggested, smiling. "Or did you have other plans?"

_Get the bloody hex off me!_

Against his will, his mind started to work. The best library he knew was Hogwarts. If he did get Snape's position, he would be able to use all the ingredients he could possibly need. Even something unusual wouldn't make anybody suspicious. That would make it easier to create an antidote for the curse the Dark Lord used against him.

"Mr Malfoy?"

"I agree," he said with a face bare any emotion.

"Splendid!" Dumbledore was beaming. "The Healers will allow you to leave, if you wish it so. You don't, by any chance, have a magical illness, do you?"

Again there was a sharp glance that seemed to touch his soul.

"No, of course not."

"Please join us at Hogwarts. It is just the beginning of August, but I am sure you would want to prepare for the lessons. And – I am telling you this in the strictest confidence – Severus will be very relieved to see you alive and well."

***

The Hall was almost empty. Only Professor McGonagall, Professor Trelawney and Headmaster Dumbledore sat at the small dining table when Draco joined them.

Trelawney wasn't saying anything, but she stared at him in an irritating and accusing way. Minerva McGonagall, not entirely convinced with Dumbledore's decision either, was hiding her grim expression with her goblet. Dumbledore was the only one who greeted him with a smile.

Draco felt waves of anger surge through his body. He had risked his life and his soul for the bloody war, and all he had earned were these suspicious looks.

He made forced conversation with McGonagall and Dumbledore –Trelawney didn't open her mouth once during the entire meal – and excused himself very early.

Reaching Snape's former quarters, his mind started to spin. The pain was ready to burn his bones, and his vision blurred. He sank down on the teacher's chair and closed his eyes. He wondered if he would ever able to move again.

***

Some hours later, he woke up with another terrible pain, this time in his neck. Snape's desk chair looked okay for sitting and lecturing students, but it was torture to sleep in.

It was dark as always in the dungeons, but his sense of time told him it was well past midnight. He could still feel the burning, but the pain was more bearable now.

He was wide awake for once, and decided to make a visit to Severus, despite the late hour. He knew from Dumbledore that the Potions Master was only sleeping two hours out of twenty-four, and he hoped that he didn't catch them.

Hogwarts was eerily quiet, and he felt like an intruder as he stepped without a sound through the castle. It was a weird feeling to wander through the castle which he never thought he would see again. He passed the Bloody Baron, who nodded shortly in his direction.

Draco reached the rooms Madam Pomfrey had chosen for Professor Snape and knocked on the door.

A voice from inside answered, and he hastily entered the room.

"Who is it?" Snape's voice asked hoarsely.

"Professor Snape …"

"Oh, really?" the Potions Master snorted. "Impossible, unless someone has managed to clone me. Is that you, Draco?"

"Yes, Sir."

A weak, but impatient wave with a wand, and a soft light appeared in the room.

"Come here and sit, so I don't have to yell," Snape ordered shortly and pointed to a chair next to his bed. The two of them regarded each other carefully.

Snape's face was still showing signs of torture, and he was terribly thin, but the black eyes were piercing as always. Draco didn't know what these eyes saw in his own face, but he started to squirm uncomfortably. Snape held his gaze a little longer, then looked in another direction.

"I am sorry about your mother," he finally said.

"How did you…"

"I keep myself informed. I could have told you from beginning, but you wouldn't have believed me."

"I was so sure she would have understood my actions. I thought she hated him for what he did to her and I," Draco answered quietly.

"I know. It's hard to learn the truth the way you had to."

A thick silence hung in the room.

"What happened?" Snape asked some time later.

"I …"

_Merlin, just tell him the truth! Maybe he can help you!_

"Infini …" Something shifted inside his body, and the burning pain started to heighten. "I can't remember anything," he lied hastily.

"Is that so."

"I can remember … killing father … and Voldemort appeared … but I don't know what he did to me."

Snape still focused on Draco's face.

"Why are you lying?"

"I'm not." Draco snapped.

"You told Professor Dumbledore the same thing, and he didn't believe you one bit.  Neither do I."

Draco thought hard to find some avoiding answer, and gave finally up. Snape wouldn't believe him anyway.

"I can't tell you. Please, don't ask me any more questions."

"I only hope you know what you are doing."

"Honestly, I'm not sure. But – I just can't."

Snape seemed to be very worried, but decided to drop the subject for once.

"If you change your mind, you know where to find me."

***

A month later

Draco had never cursed himself so hard as he had this evening.

_How could I have even THOUGHT  about  agreeing to this shit?_

The whole Hall was staring in his direction, even before Dumbledore announced him to be the temporary potions teacher and head of Slytherin house. They were all sceptical and suspicious.

The Slytherin table was deadly silent, but the staring from their direction almost burned him where he sat. Many parents had been unmasked as Death Eaters, and Draco was known as the spy who worked for the Order, so he was the perfect target for their hatred.

Argus Filch, sitting next to him, snorted.

"Don't let them get to you, Malfoy.  Make them realise that you can take off _as many_ house points as you want."

"Believe me, I will."

Draco watched over the tables while Professor McGonagall came in with the first years. 

Another pair of eyes met his glance with a curious expression. Virginia Wesley's face reddened as she was caught staring and she quickly turned her head in another direction.


	3. Weasley vs McKinley

The first weeks passed in a maddeningly slow fashion and were full of trouble.

Of course, Potions wasn't a problem for Draco. It was still his favourite subject, and he knew he could easily transfer his excellent grasp of it to his students. Also, he was completely taken aback by how much _fun _it wasto teach.

The _real _trouble was the mistrust and contempt he had to face each day. The Slytherins were the worst, and the other houses weren't far behind. The first years were easy to handle, but the seventh years were really getting on his nerves. Lots of house points were taken off, which didn't make him any more popular. He tried to check his temper, but calling it easy would have been a lie. 

After his classes and the work related to them, he sat in the library, searching desperately for a cure against Voldemort's hex. He tried to avoid the attentions of Madam Pince, who in his opinion was far too curious. So far he'd come up with nothing. Voldemort had told him the truth: no simple cure existed. 

Several magical painkillers, based on potion ingredients, weren't helping in the least.

Draco knew he looked ill. Some teachers and even a few of the students had already seen the signs, and the first rumours were creeping through the school.

"Aren't you feeling well?" Professor Sinistra, sitting next to him, asked one evening.

"I don't know what you mean", he answered, looking her straight in the eyes.

The older woman regarded him carefully before turning her gaze on to her plate instead. 

"I am not the only one who has noticed", she said quietly, so as not to attract anyone's attention. "I even heard some Gryffindors talking about it."

"So?" Draco's voice was icy, but his mind was in turmoil. It was obvious he couldn't go on like this. He had to find a cure or at least a way to mask the symptoms.

***

He'd just taught a double Potions class, Slytherin and Gryffindor, seventh year.

Draco had been very close to throwing self-discipline to the winds, wanting to hex some of the students. Many of them were close to his age, most of them only a year younger, and they made it very clear that they didn't respect him at all. Those few who really wanted to learn, in order to get good grades in their final exams, were having a very hard time. He was secretly surprised to notice Virginia Weasley among them. She even snapped at her fellow students when they once again disrupted the lesson.

Now she was standing accusingly in front of a Slytherin at least a foot taller than her. Draco knew Angus McKinley personally from his own school days and knew he shouldn't be messed with. But the small Gryffindor wasn't showing any signs of fear.

"You better get your hands off my beetle eyes, or next time you'll be collecting your fingers from the floor!" she hissed.

McKinley just watched her, obviously amused.

"Oh please, Weasley, it's almost as if you were _really _interested in Potions", he answered lazily. "Rather than trying to ingratiate yourself with _Professor _Malfoy." He didn't even try to keep his voice down.

Ginny's face turned as red as her hair. She was clearly furious.

"For your information", she stated in a voice so icy as to almost rival Snape's. "I don't need to ingratiate myself with anyone, as you so nicely put it. You want to fail your exam? That's your problem. There are others here who do need good grades, so leave me alone, or you'll regret it."

"My, are we a little frustrated?" McKinley was smirking. "Maybe because darling Potter isn't around anymore? I heard Dumbledore's pet is now training to be an auror. Must be horrible for you, longing for somebody that far away …"

There was a loud noise as Ginny slapped him hard in the face.

"You rotten Gryff!" McKinley grabbed his wand.

"Mr McKinley. Twenty points from Slytherin, and unless you want to make it fifty, you should be very careful how you take it from here." Draco had had enough.

McKinley froze on the spot, his dark, hard eyes staring hatefully in Draco's direction.

"Well, haven't we've grown high and mighty lately, eh, Malfoy?"

Draco forgot about acting the teacher and grabbed McKinley's collar forcefully.

"Repeat that, McKinley, and you will be sharing a cell with your father in Azkaban!"

His voice was so full of rage that the younger Slytherin almost toppled over the next desk in his hurry to get away.

"And if you DARE insult me again, just once, I will gladly assist Miss Weasley in cutting off your fingers! Leave this classroom!" The last words came out in what was almost a yell.

"Draco, don't!" Ginny took hold of his arm. "Stop it, he isn't worth it!"

McKinley grabbed his books and left the room at a run, glancing back fearfully over his shoulder.

"You may remove your hand from my arm now!" Draco snapped at Ginny. "And by the way, since when are we on a first-name basis? _Miss _Weasley?"

"Sorry", she murmured, getting her things together. "It won't happen again, sir."

"I hope not", he answered coldly, turning his back on her. At that very moment he felt another attack coming on, and had to steady himself by holding on to the table. He gritted his teeth audibly.

"Dra .. Mr Malfoy? Are you okay?"

"There is nothing wrong with me!" he hissed. "Go away and _stay_ away!"

Glancing back doubtfully, Ginny left the classroom.


	4. Mars shines bright tonight

AN: Just for information: This story was written before Book 5 came out. In later chapters, there will appear some persons, places or such we know from OtP, but storyline is still keeping up from GoF standards. Sirius is still alive, Lucius Malfoy hadn't been in Azkaban … things like that.

Thanks to my new beta Anna who remembered me to mention that, and for the wonderful work she does with my bad English.

Thanks to all Reviewers, too. I will hurry up translating, but it might take a while because I am writing a german story at the same time, and it is close to showdown. And the german reviewers threatened to hex me and my mailbox if I won't continue. But with one or two nightshifts, you will get the next chapter as soon as humanly possible!

***

Draco kicked his bedpost and swore.

He knew it was childish, but he couldn't stop himself. The scene with McKinley kept playing over and over in his mind and he realized that only Ginny's intervention had prevented him from doing something very stupid.

The fact that she'd seen him being weak wasn't helping.

_You are a Malfoy, act as one! _He snorted. _Oh, Draco, who are you kidding? You're nothing, a useless nothing! You can't even convince yourself!_

He kicked his bedpost as hard a he could, and the four-poster bed swayed slightly. The pain in his foot was welcome as it distracted him from the other, deep inside his body.

_Voldemort was right. I just wish he had killed me when he had the chance._

***

To get some distraction, and because he didn't know what else to do, he went to the library. The large room was empty and deadly silent. Not even Madam Pince was around. Thanks to the intervention of Professor Snape, he was free to use the library whenever he pleased - even at night.

No nosy students, no curious Madam Pince - but even so, what good did it do?

He felt like the only human being left on earth, alone in the dark creepy library.

Draco tried to focus on those books he had not yet read. Minutes later, he had a strong sense of someone watching him, and raised his head slowly.

A pair of green eyes were staring in his direction. The owner of the eyes was sitting on one of the tables, staring thoughtfully in the ex-Slytherin's direction.

"Potter. Shouldn't you be off doing something heroic? Rather than just sitting there watching me." He meant to be sarcastic, but even in his own ears it sounded tired and barely annoyed.

"Malfoy." Harry inclined his head briefly, but didn't stop regarding Draco carefully. "I heard you are the substitute Potions teacher?"

"Any reason why I shouldn't be?" 

Harry just shook his head.

"Don't you think", he said slowly, as if weighing each word carefully, "it's time for us to make a truce, Malfoy? We are on the same side … at least we were, just recently."

"Save it, Potty." Draco shut his book with a bang. "Weasel and Mudblood may bow in front of you and chant heroic hymns, but don't try that shit with me. What the hell are you doing here anyway?"

"It's a free country", Harry shrugged.

"Do me a favour and  go enjoy it elsewhere. I have to work, and you are polluting the air in here."

Harry rose and sighed mock dramatically.

"You will never change, Malfoy."

"I'm not interested in changing. Get lost."

Harry stayed where he was.

"You look like a ghost", he said in such a calm voice that Draco wanted to hex him on the spot. "People are talking about you, even Ron and I have heard some rumours. And Ginny told us …"

Draco jumped up.

"Why is everybody so interested in my personal affairs?" he hissed. "What part of 'get lost' didn't you understand, Potter? Leave me the fuck alone!!"

His voice was full of hate and anger, and his knuckles, gripping his wand, were white.

Harry opened his mouth to shout something in response, but at that moment, the curse in Draco's bloodstream decided to flex its muscles, and shot like lightning through his bones.

Draco gave out a strangled cry and fell on to his knees. The impact made him bite his tongue and he spat some blood on to the floor. The world was fading around him.

Standing on the brink of unconsciousness, he tried to get some air into his lungs. Potter was forgotten, the fear of giving away his secret … Merlin, just enough air to breathe …

From very far away he could hear someone asking him if he was okay. A hand was shaking his shoulder.

The next moment he could see clearly again.

"Get your hands off me!" He gave Harry a violent push.

"You are nuts!" Harry was losing his patience. "I don't care a fucking damn what you are doing with your life, Malfoy! But as long as you are staying at Hogwarts, you are a danger to everybody around you, whatever  it is Voldemort has done to you! Heaven knows what Dumbledore's motives are for hiring you, of all people!"

Harry wiped his hands on his robes as if he had touched something filthy, and threw Draco a disgusted look. Without another word he stormed out of the library.

***

The next morning Draco saw Potter and Weasley at the Gryffindor table. Ginny was sitting between them, and they seemed to be having a great time.

Draco, on the other hand, felt like he was being trampled by a horde of hippogriffs. All of his muscles were cramped up and he felt ready to faint at any minute. Maybe he should go to the hospital wing, but what would he tell Madam Pomfrey?

"What are _they _doing here?" he asked Professor Sinistra quietly, nodding discreetly towards the Gryffindor table.

"Mr Potter and Mr Weasley? As far as I know, they had an appointment with Professor Dumbledore, and this afternoon the members of  the Order of the Phoenix are meeting."

"Lovely." This information hit a sore spot, but he tried hide that from Sinistra. So he had never been an official member of the Order, but he had played a part in the damn war, so why did everybody shut him out?

He pushed away his plate angrily. At that moment, Ron Weasley threw a mocking glance in his direction. Harry turned to see what his friend was looking at and nudged him gently in the ribs, saying something. Weasley was sneering now.

_I'll KILL him if he tells the Weasel about what happened yesterday_!

His friendly thoughts were interrupted by owls, bringing the mail. His own eagle owl, Desdemona, landed near his plate and ruffled her feathers in an annoyed manner. Draco took the small parchment tied to her leg and regarded her carefully. He had neglected her during the last few weeks, and Des was obviously angry with him, as she departed as soon as he'd taken his piece of parchment.

Draco looked suspiciously at the letter.

_Dear Mr Malfoy,_

_Following the tragical and regrettable death of your respected father _- Draco snorted at that - _I have been ordered to present you with his last will._

_Mrs Narcissa Malfoy has insisted on sending you the documents by owl since she isn't willing to contact you in person._

_The inheritance reads as follows: The family fortune, amounting to 52 million galleouns, will be divided between Mrs Narcissa Malfoy and Mr Draco Malfoy.  Malfoy Manor, including furnishings and land, goes to Narcissa Malfoy while Draco Malfoy will inherit Crestville House and the London city apartment._

_The money and the deeds of ownership have been transferred to your vault at Gringott's. Please sign the enclosed documents…_

Draco was ready to rip the paper to shreds, and his teeth were clenched. It was more or less what he had anticipated, but he had still hoped that his mother would finally come to her senses. But he had been wrong again.

"Bad news?" Trelawney asked in a saccharine voice. 

It had become apparent shortly after his arrival in August that the two of them couldn't stand each other one bit. It was no secret that the Divination teacher had protested fiercely when Draco was chosen by Dumbledore.

Draco stared coldly in her direction, but didn't bother to say anything. Instead he rose and left the Great Hall.

***

"Do _you _know about the meeting?"

Snape gave Draco a cool look.

"I do. I will be informed about the results."

Draco tried to suppress his anger.

"Why isn't anybody telling me anything? I have the same right to be there as they do!"

"You would, but in this special case, you don't. The meeting is about you."

"What?!"

"Most of the members of the Order are convinced that the Dark Lord did something to you. Your appearance and your behaviour over the last few weeks support that theory. They think you are a potentially dangerous."

"I am what!? I don't get it!" Draco was yelling now. "I'm not harming anybody, I even tried … hell, why _am _I actually trying to do? Why won't people just leave me the fuck alone?"

He thumped the bedside table menacingly.

"Are you done?" Snape asked him icily. "Are you ready to act like an adult, rather than behaving like a child?"

Draco was shaking with rage, but lowered his balled fists.

"No, I'm not", he answered in a voice as cold as Snape's, turned on his heels and stormed  out of the room. 

Snape was left alone, gazing at the door where Draco had disappeared.

***

Draco was aware of the curious and puzzled looks he got as he ran towards the dungeons, but he didn't care at all. To hell with Hogwarts and Dumbledore, he had had enough. He would pack his things and get out of there.

_Potentially dangerous! Oh, please!_

He threw some personal things into a small bag, slung it over his shoulder and left the castle. The house elves would pack the rest and send it on. 

On his way out, he passed Potter and Weasley, but ignored them as best he could.

He made his way towards Hogsmeade because it was the best point to Disapparate.  The London apartment had to do for now. Crestville House, as far as he knew, hadn't been lived in for ages, and he didn't want to be uncomfortable.

His way took him past the outskirts of the Forbidden Forest. Suddenly a deep voice called out to him, and he flinched. Visions from his first year came crashing through his mind: the dead unicorn, Voldemort...hastily, he pulled out his wand.

"Young Malfoy, isn't it?" the voice asked. It sounded amused.

"Who's asking?" he hissed, retreating slowly. 

A centaur came walking out of the coppice. He had a palomino body, and there was something vaguely familiar about his whole appearance.

"Firenze", the centaur reminded him. "We met once."   

Now Draco remembered it all.

"Oh, right. You rescued or hero", he spat.

Firenze tapped his hoof on the ground.

"May I ask you a personal question, Draco Malfoy?"

"If I don't have to answer it."

The centaur didn't seem to hear this. 

"Why are you running away?"

"How do … I'm not running away! What gave you that idea?"

"You try to fight fire with fire, Draco Malfoy. You are trying to pinpoint a problem. Instead, you should look for a solution.

"I don't see your point."

"Think it over." Firenze turned and trotted back toward the forest. "You have to extinguish the flames, young Malfoy. Remember that."

Draco was alone again, staring towards the place where the centaur had disappeared.

"The bloke is totally off his rocker." 


	5. Flames

_AN: Thanks to Madeline for beating. I am trying to keep up with the translations!_

_***_

_Extinguish the flames, young Malfoy. Remember that._

Draco was still staring at the spot where Firenze had disappeared. But his brain was working hard.

What did Firenze know? He _had_ toknow something, that much was obvious, but how much, and, finally, where from? Centaurs were very talented in divination – Draco was more  inclined to believe them than  Trelawney, that much was for sure – but was that all?

Draco's strong decision to leave Hogwarts in an instant was fading away at those thoughts. Probably there might be a solution for his problems, but if he really sat in his apartment at London, it would be more difficult to reach it. But he clenched his teeth at the thought of just backing away and returning as if nothing had happened.

_Don't be **stupid** Malfoy! You want to get rid of the hex?! So overcome your snobbishness and go back!!!_

Furiously, he kicked a stone out of his way and retreated to Hogwarts.

***

Due to a lifetime of practice, he managed to keep his face emotionless as he passed a small group of members of the Order of the Phoenix on his way to the library. Potter and Weasley were amongst them, as quite as suspected, and also Hermione Granger, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin.

Draco ignored them all and followed his ways. He was in a hurry to get back to the library and think about Firenze's words.

"Would you give me the opportunity to speak with you in private, Mr Malfoy?" Lupin asked unexpectedly.

Draco had a short, menacing answer on his tongue, but instead, he only nodded curtly.

"Sure," he answered coolly. "I was on my way to the library. If you care to join me?"

"Remus …" Sirius Black started, but after the warning glance the werewolf shot him, he shut up.

The Slytherin motioned for his former DA teacher to go first, and entered the library after him. With one scanning look, he noticed that there weren't many pupils to watch them. Fine by him.

Lupin was regarding him with the same look he knew from Dumbledore, Snape and even Potter.

"Stop staring at me!" he snapped, knowing he wasn't very polite, but he didn't give a damn.

Lupin kept on his friendly smile anyway.

"I don't want to question you again, Mr Malfoy. I heard, the others did that quite enough."

"What do you want from me then?"

Lupin answered with something he was totally surprised.

"You are the owner of Crestville House now, am I correct?"

"Um – right." Draco was taken aback. "How did you know?"

"Well, I wanted to buy the place, and your mother told me you inherited it instead of her. Lucius Malfoy never was interested to sell it – are you?"

"_Why _are you interested? It's been unused for– oh, I don't know, centuries! – and it's kind of small and shabby!"

"These are private, Mr Malfoy. Are you interested to make a deal?"

Draco's Slytherin mind started to work hard. Private? Or other things he didn't know yet?

"I am not sure," he said slowly. "I wanted to check on it myself first." That was a lie, but Lupin's interest made him way to curious to give the place away without looking at first.

Lupin wasn't showing any signs of disappointment.

"Just send me an owl if you decide what to do. I don't want to disturb you any longer."

He nodded politely, than turned and was about to leave the library.

"Professor Lupin?" This came out of Draco's mouth before he realized he was starting to say something.

The werewolf turned around, and Draco mentally kicked himself.

"I --- uh --- Why should somebody concentrate on a solution, instead of the problem itself?"

_You're nuts! You're totally nuts!_

If Lupin was surprised by the question, he hid it very well.

"It's better to concentrate on the consequences a problem is causing when you are not able to eliminate it the other way round. Do you ask that on purpose?"

"No. Yes. Hell, damned if I know."

Lupin's gaze was piercing now.

"If I am able to help you, please let me know. I am sure, you know why the Order met today?"

Draco growled something under his breath. Why the sodding hell was he asking Lupin, of all people? He had to be more desperate than even knew himself.

Lupin waited for an answer, but as none came, he just shrugged and left the library.

_Consequences. Pinpoint a problem. Don't fight fire with fire … Merlin, I will go crazy any minute!_

Draco was very close to hitting his forehead on the desk in front of him.

_Malfoy, get a grip. Remember something called logic. Okay, first, the curse is the problem. Second, the pain is the consequence. Whoa, wait a minute. It's not. FIRE is the consequence. How do you fight fire? You extinguish it. Firenze's words. Where is myLatin when I need it? Extinguere. You have to search for extinguere, you complete idiot!!_

This time, he DID crush his head on the table. The few students and Madam Pince were taken aback, but he didn't care. Draco pushed himself to work again, this time not searching for the hex but instead for his Latin solution.

Hours later, he was close to doubt his Theory, he found it, in one of the oldest books. The _Infinitus Flamma _was just barely mentioned, no wonder he hadn't found it in first place. It was no permanent solution, but …

It was a receipt for a potion. Due to the book, it was _very _complicated, but not impossible. The problem was, the pain wouldn't just go away. It would be concentrated on a certain moment. That is, it would hit him every third or fourth month. But wasn't that better than to endure it all the time?


	6. Trouble in Slytherin

The next days and weeks Draco was occupied with what he hoped would be the solution to his problem. The making of the potion was far more complicated than he had thought. But, on the other hand, he had no other hope. Some of the ingredients weren't easily gotten, not in Diagon Alley, or it's dark pendant, Knockturn Alley. He wasn't able to just ask Snape, now was he?

His connections to the Malfoy family were gone forever, knowing his father was a Death Eater, but there were still some sources he could use. Money was working wonders, sometimes, it just lasted a while.

The other thing he had to deal with was Crestville House. He just wasn't able to believe that Lupin's interest was just a "family affair".

_You are on your way to developing a persecution complex. There nothing extraordinary with that place! Okay, except for some trivia._

Crestville was way older than Malfoy Manor, and constructed about the sixteenth century. There was nothing to find about the original constructor. The Malfoy family had become the owners much later, because of some deal or some kind of blackmail, it wasn't clarified. Why his ancestors were so fascinated by this place, that was a new mystery. It had been inhabited just sporadically.

Draco, like everyone else, knew the stories about Muggles, who had moved in strange old houses and experienced true horrors, but that only made him snort. This were Muggles, correct? One of the oldest wizarding families wouldn't be frantic about some lousy ghosts, right? There had to be another reason. Lucius' refusal to sell the place, while it was apparently not any kind of worth and unused, made him more suspicious.

Draco shut the pergaments he had gotten from his source with a bang. It was time to care about the potion, Crestville House would have to wait.

Absorbed in his thoughts, he was ran into somebody on his way to the dungeons.

"Watch it!" he snapped.

It was – _why on earth always HER?_ – Ginny Weasley. But instead of the normal, sometimes reluctant answers he was used to, she only glared back.

"Probably _you_ should watch it, Malfoy. Maybe by opening your eyes while walking?" she hissed and pushed him violently out of the way.

Draco stared after her, dumbfounded. This was so unusual for her. Then something sprang in his eyes. The backside of her cloak was dirty, and one sleeve was torn out.

"Gi – Miss Weasley?"

"What do you want from me?" she almost yelled, as she turned around. Her eyes were filled with unshed tears, which she had bravely tried to suppress.

_Gryffindor. So typical._

But he saw something more, and his gaze became dangerous. The left side of her throat, almost covered with her clothing, bared a dark red mark, which was obviously a strangulation mark.

"What happened?" he demanded sharply.

"Nothing," spat Ginny. "Nothing _you_ have to care about!"

With that sentence, she turned and almost stormed away.

Draco turned too, and grimly made his way to the Slytherin common room. He had quite a good idea who the attacker was.

* * *

Angus McKinley stood in the middle of the room and was basking in the attention he got.

"You should have seen that," he said mockingly. "That silly cow had no chance against the _Imperio._ Gryffindors could do to strengthen their defence. It was a laughable site when she almost strangled herself!"

The others laughed maliciously.

One of the Slytherins, a fourth year, glanced accidentally to the door, and recognised Draco, standing there with his arms entwined and a murderous look on his face. She sent McKinley a warning glance, but he didn't pay any attention.

"This should be a warning for her to behave herself better," he said, contented. "Next time, she doesn't get away this easily."

Now more of the Slytherins had noticed Draco. Not all of them were thrilled about McKinleys's actions, and they were looking forward the coming confrontation.

Anger boiled in Draco, but gritted his teeth and sauntered coolly in the room.

"You really decided to take my advice to accompany your father in Azkaban?" he mused loudly.

McKinley was taken aback, but he masked his face with a malicious smile.

"And what do you mean with that? _Sir_?" he asked calmly, the _Sir _obviously mocking.

"As far as I know," Draco answered icily, "The _Imperius _curse is a forbidden one."

"_Imperius_?" McKinley pulled an innocent face. "I would never do that."

"Really. I heard every word."

"And you can prove that how?"

Draco glanced around. Most of the Slytherins made uninvolved faces, and the few people who didn't agreed with McKinley's actions watched the floor carefully.

Draco knew Slytherin's rules all too well – don't sell out somebody from your own house.

"With me. Now!"

* * *

"You don't have ANY proof at all, Malfoy!"

McKinley was standing in Snape's former office, while Draco sat behind the desk.

"And what if I had a deposition?" Draco answered slowly, focusing on each word. "My word and Ginevra Weasley's? It would be enough to insist the appliance of _Verita_." He was bluffing, Ginny wouldn't say a word, he was sure.

McKinley glared hatefully in his direction, but he fell for it.

"What do you want from me?"

"A few things. First, some respect wouldn't be too bad. Second, no further attacks on Miss Weasley. Third – don't tell anybody about this conversation."

"Do I have a choice?" McKinley hissed. "Can I leave now?"

"Just one thing more, Angus. If I ever hear something like this again, you just don't have to fear to be expelled. I will make you regret, and you know, what I am capable of. And now get lost."

The door slammed shut after McKinley, and the potion bottles were rattled under the force.

Draco shut his eyes and tried to relax. The confrontation had been foreseeable, but that didn't mean he was very enjoyed about it. Deep inside he felt like a traitor, after all, he hadn't been reacting any better than McKinley some months ago.

He heard a loud knock on the door and flinched.

"In!" he shouted angrily.

It was McGonagall, and her face was fiery red.

_Oh, what else?!_

"Professor McGonagall. Is there something I can do for you?"

Her eyes flashed furious lightning in his direction.

"You own me an explanation. Ginevra Weasley was attacked this afternoon, and I have the strong suspicion it was a member of _your _house, Mr Malfoy!"

"I took care about this", he said coolly. "It won't happen again, you can be sure."

McGonagall tried to calm down, but she hadn't finished.

"Professor Snape would never had tolerated this kind of behaviour ..."

"_I am not Snape_!" Draco now lost his control. "Excuse me, Professor, but it was Dumbledore who suggested me for this job. Ask _him _why! And I don't think Snape had taken care of what happened with Ginny Weasley! You think it's easy for me to speak against my own house? I am sick of all this shit, and I would gladly leave, better sooner than later!"

In his fury, he swept down a bottle, which was standing in front of his desk. The splinters were flying everywhere.

McGonagall became very quiet during his tirade, and was looking intently at him.

Draco's own face was as red as it could become, and he was staring at McGonagall challengingly.

"Miss Weasley hadn't said any word. I have only seen her and added one and one," she answered calmly. "She is now at the hospital wing and told Poppy something about an accident. Can I be sure that something like that won't happen again?"

"If it's by me, you can. Otherwise, there will be ejections. I swear."

McGonagall nodded, and turned to go. But she stopped at the door.

"You are not Severus, that's right. But believe me Draco, you aren't so bad yourself as a teacher."

She disappeared, and Draco only shook his head. What a hell of a day!


	7. Thickhead vs Dumbledore

**Thickhead vs. Dumbledore**

Draco knew there was somebody else he had to talk to. Not that he was thrilled about that.

"Mr Malfoy?" Madam Pomfrey's glance was a surprised one.

"I have to talk to Miss Weasley."

Poppy's eyebrows almost touched her hairline.

"She is sleeping," she answered shortly.

"It's urgent."

"So?" Her voice was frosty. "She isn't feeling very well. Come again tomorrow, if you have to."

"Madam Pomfrey, with all due respect, I _know _she isn't sleeping. And I want to prevent further … accidents."

Her hand was drumming on her desk.

"What do you know about that?"

"A lot more than I want to," Draco answered sullenly. "And I don't want an attack of the whole Weasley family on me, thank you very much. What about my request?"

Madam Pomfrey was still sceptic.

"Five minutes. And if she don't want to talk with you, I will remove you personally, with a _Petrificus Totalus _if necessary, clear?"

"Crystal."

* * *

Ginny wasn't sleeping, as he had suspected. She turned her head abruptly as he entered the room. 

"Malfoy," she said icily. "What do you want?"

He ignored her aggressive voice.

"To talk to you."

"There is nothing to talk about."

"Right, and my name is Prince Charming. I know exactly what is going on in that head of yours, Weasley, and I advise you strongly to forget it very fast. McKinley will leave you alone in the future."

Her eyes were blazing now.

"He will pay for it, understood?" she hissed. "I don't need a _Malfoy _to sort my priorities out!"

He grabbed her shoulder, harder than he had intended to.

"Listen, Weasley, he will leave you _alone,"_ he hissed back. "If you continue your silly little revenge, I can guarantee nothing. McKinley isn't to be played around with, I know him better than you!"

He was leaning very close over Ginny.

The Gryffindor was in such a rage, that she raised her hand without thinking and it landed with a hard _smack _on Draco's face.

Draco hadn't seen that, and due to the power of the blow, he staggered back, lost his balance and knocked his head against the wall. Like it had been a trigger, the pain in his body reached a new state of agony. He slid inelegantly down the wall and gasped desperately for air. It hadn't been easy before, but this was simply unbearable.

Ginny watched him with a wide open mouth.

"Malfoy? What is going on with you?"

From the other side, Madam Pomfrey bursted in the room.

"What … Merlin's beard! What happened, Miss Weasley?"

Ginny just shook her head, shocked.

"I … we … we had an argument," she stammered. "He is … he had …"

Draco wasn't listening; he was still trying to get some air into his lungs.

Pomfrey raised her wand and murmured something, and he lost consciousness.

* * *

He was moaning softly as he awakened. The horribly pain was still raging through his body, it was like a demon ripping his guts into shreds. He opened his eyes a little bit and slammed them shut again. The sunlight in the room just made it worse. 

Some voices were in the background, and he tried to shut them out, but wasn't able to.

"I hit him in the face," said Ginny's voice. She sounded guilty.

"Did he provoke you?" That was McGonagall.

Ginny didn't answer.

"I think he woke up," said Pomfrey a little while later.

"Mr Malfoy?" Dumbledore – not him again!

Draco lifted himself up a little, trying to open his eyes again. The light was still too penetrative.

"What happened?" he muttered.

"We would gladly appreciate that answer from you."

"I can't remember." This came out promptly and self-confidently, but he didn't felt like that in any case.

"I am sorry, Mr Malfoy, but I do not believe you. Why do you stubbornly insist on keeping what happened to you a secret?" Even Dumbledore's voice seemed a little sharp.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

_It would be better to tattoo that sentence on my forehead._

"And _I _think that you know exactly what I mean."

"No."

"Rubbish," he heard Ginny muttering some distance away.

"You do not leave me a choice, Draco. Under these circumstances, I am unable to let you continue teaching, you must be aware of that."

"Why?" Draco brought himself up, flinching visibly. "I don't understand the whole flap in the least! If I am a _potential danger_," he emphasized that, "why wasn't anybody harmed? I mean, except myself, but this is my business. Only mine, you understand?"

"The Order disagrees with you," Minerva McGonagall answered heatedly, but when Dumbledore winked, she silenced.

"Please leave us alone for a moment. Poppy, Minerva, Miss Weasley?"

Pomfrey snorted. McGonagall was murmuring something, but both of them vanished. Ginny followed them, but she involuntary looked over her shoulder, and her glance met Draco's. Her eyes were huge and questioning. Draco made an effort to stare coldly back, but had the growing suspicion he didn't manage all too well.

Meanwhile, Dumbledore looked out of the window.

"Will there be an end to this?" he asked calmly, after Ginny had closed the door.

"I'm close to a solution." Draco wasn't up to saying more, his tone made that very it clear.

The older man shook his head doubtfully.

"It is your decision to be sure, but maybe I should emphasize my words: if something like today happens again – in public, in front of students or even the other teachers – I will be forced to release you. And I would really appreciate it if you would not conceal it."

Draco kept stubbornly silent.

"As Minerva said, you will have huge problems with the Order when the incident today becomes public. Which brings me on another issue, what happened between you and Miss Weasley? I cannot believe the ´accident´ she told us of."

"Who am I to tell you if she herself doesn't want to?"

"To be a teacher does not mean only to bring them the subject matter. You also carry responsibility for them."

"Oh right, I saw that every day on Severus."

_I'm nuts. First I stand on Weasley's side, and now I'm criticising Snape. What the hell is happening with me?_

Dumbledore for sure hadn't overheard the jibe, but he decided to skip it.

"Professor McGonagall just informed me that she talked with you, and I have to agree with her. You do a good job as a teacher, but you try too much to act alone. This is just another incident to prove it."

"May I go now?" Draco had had enough.

"Sure. But please consider my words."

* * *

Draco was angry with Ginny, but first with himself. Couldn't that have happened in his rooms at least? He would have been spared Dumbledore's lecture, and if there was one thing he hated, it was people pointing his faults out, and on top of that, to be entitled to. 

It was high time to finish that damn potion. But an ingredient was still missing, a plant which was growing in very few regions. Unfortunately England was not one of those regions, and Borgin who had overtaken the procurement wasn't able to tell him a fixed date. It could take one or two months.

And that was definitely too long.

Someone knocked on the door.

"In!" Inwardly, he groaned. _Please, not McGonagall again!_

"May I come in?" _Weasley._

"If it's absolutely necessary." Draco wasn't too thrilled to see her.

"I wanted to apologize." This time it was Ginny who ignored his abrasive tone. "And to thank you."

"What for?" He felt obviously uncomfortable.

"Because you didn't tell Professor McGonagall and the Headmaster what really happened."

"Who said I didn't?"

Ginny snorted.

"Okay, let's just say I had a feeling. By the way, I will accept your suggestion despite the fact that I don't like it in any way. I mean the McKinley affair."

"So much the better," he answered shortly. "Anything else?"

"About what happened in the hospital wing …." She looked him straight in the eyes, but Draco didn't play along.

"Not your business. And do me a favour now and leave me alone. I have work to do."

Ginny rolled her eyes, but she left the room without another word.

* * *

The next morning in Potions, it was obvious McKinley was sticking to the bargain. He didn't even so much as look at Ginny but looked straight through her, when she accidentally crossed his path. Even the other Slytherins stayed more calm than usual. 

Ginny, on the other hand, was keeping her promise too, and the other Gryffindors hadn't been told the truth, either. The black and blue marks on her neck had vanished, thanks to Madam Pomfrey and she acted like nothing had happened. But Draco knew it was hard for her, especially since she normally had a temperament similar to his own.

The lesson was astonishingly quiet, obviously McKinley had warned the others to be careful in the presence of Draco Malfoy.

This was exactly what Draco needed, a few times he was barely able to stand because of the pain. Since yesterday it had become even worse. But he knew that Dumbledore would fire him if he showed any sign of discomfort, and he simply couldn't afford that at the moment.

During lunch, something happened which raised his mood visibly. A thin envelope, sent by Borgin came over by owl, brought over by an owl who had seen better days.

_Finally!_


	8. A surprising result

**A surprising result**

Draco was staring at the small flask standing in front of him. The Extinguere serum – he called it that secretly – was finished. But despite everything, he still hesitated to take it. He had turned into dangerous terrain, and he knew it all too well. He would be addicted to that potion in the future, willing or no.

He wasn't at Hogwarts but in London. The apartment hadn't been used for a long time now, but he had ordered some house-elves to tidy up earlier, so it wasn't too uncomfortable. If his calculations were correct he wouldn't be able to move a single muscle in the following 24-hours, and he couldn't risk somebody in Hogwarts seeing him. He had the whole weekend, and nobody would miss him.

He tiredly pushed a strand of his hair behind his ear. The last months had fed visibly on his strength. Four weeks had passed after the last confrontation with Dumbledore. It had taken so long to finish the potion. Now it was the beginning of December.

Snape's condition had improved over the weeks, and he would be ready to take over his post in the next school year.

He didn't know if he was really glad about that. On one hand, it sure would be relieving to leave all this behind him, but on the other … what to do afterwards? In Hogwarts he had a task, even if it was sometimes an annoying one. And sitting alone in an empty apartment wasn't something he was eager for.

_Really, probably a life as Lucius Malfoy's son would have been easier. Oh, yeah, who are you kidding, Draco? Slaughtering people or sitting in Azkaban would have been **very **charming._

"Oh shut it," he muttered, and his inner voice silenced. Again, he turned to the flask in his hands.

He had never been so aware of the fact that he was alone. The thought would have made him laugh at school, but now he couldn't find anything about that fact laughable. He wasn't Snape who preferred to ignore people around him, living just for his potions.

He thought regretfully about Pansy. The youngest Parkinson daughter had been killed in the war against Voldemort. Against all rumors they had spread so carefully, they never had been a couple. Pansy just had been the closest friend he ever had, and they had understood each other even without many words. Her death had been more painful than everything else he had experienced before – except the _Flamma _of course.

Crabbe was dead, too, and Goyle – hopeless. His father sat in Azkaban, and he would have risked a _Crucio _to approach him. Milly Bulstrode was imprisoned in Azkaban, too.

And there weren't any people left. Lucius Malfoy never had allowed his son to have too many real friends. For the dead Malfoy senior, a concept like friendship hadn't existed at all. At that time, Draco had the same opinion – excluding Pansy – but everything was a little different now.

He pushed his chair back and started to wander around, restlessly.

Since he had met Potter in the Hogwarts' train, he had despised him for being friends with Weasley and later with Granger too. A Weasel and a Mudblood, of all people! At the same time he had been jealous of Harry because of his fame and the attention the Gryffindor got every time, despite the fact that he knew Potter had hated it. Draco would have been eager to switch places with him.

And what was the bottom line now? He, Draco Malfoy, sat here, pitying himself!

_You're so pathetic._

He turned abruptly and took the small flask, swallowing the small amount of liquid. He waited a second, and the Potion took its effect immediately.

His anticipations weren't disappointed in the least.

* * *

Sunday afternoon, Draco glanced into the mirror and almost stumbled back. 

Even the mirror wasn't making any comment, very rare for the pert thing.

A few months ago Potter had said he looked like a ghost. He had been annoyed over that comparison, but now it was simply the truth. His skin, normally pale enough as it were, was almost translucent. His eyes looked hollow and had dark rings under them. He was still shaking.

During the shear endless seeming hours he had suffered, he would have gladly taken his wand to finish himself off, but he hadn't been able to move a single muscle during the time.

Draco splashed some water in his face and fought the urge to retch again. If the old book had been right, he would feel better in the following hours. Until the next time – but he simply wasn't able to think about that yet. The thought alone made his blood run cold.

A continuous staring escorted Draco when he made his way to the staff table Monday morning.

Draco just ignored them and sat down elegantly. He could offhanded, because there wasn't any pain, it had vanished completely out of his body. For the first time after Voldemort had cursed him, he felt free of any symptoms, even if this peace would be temporarily.

* * *

Everybody was able to see his change, resulting in the stares he got. 

Professor Sinistra's facial expression was so dumbfounded he had to suppress a grin.

"Are you okay, Mr Malfoy?"

"Splendid, Professor? Why?" he answered harmlessly, but his eyes were jittering.

"You … look changed." The older woman eyed him from head to toe.

Draco didn't know if he should feel either flattered or embarrassed. But before he could prepare for an answer, he felt another glance on him, and he lifted his head, looking straight toward the Gryffindor table.

Ginny, head resting in both hands, didn't even so much as blink when they made eye contact, and neither of them looked away.

Then she smiled slightly, mouthing _better?_, and he nodded, ignoring the looks they got from the students or the staff.

Realization dawned on him, and he frowned. Why was he doing that? And with _Ginny Weasley _of all people?

Ginny was now hiding an obvious grin before returning to eat.

_Vixen. She knows full well I didn't actually want to answer her._

But he felt too well to be bothered for more than a short moment.

* * *

Everybody in Hogwarts noticed the change in Draco Malfoy. 

Almost everyone was nonplussed, not less of them suspicious. So he wasn't too surprised when after two days he got a remarkably formal letter which included an invitation to a meeting of the Order of the Phoenix. He knew all too well why.

He was twenty minutes late on purpose. All others were seated, and the silence in this secret room of Hogwarts was overbearing.

Draco seemed to be unaffected when he entered. He saw Potter, Weasley and Granger together on a bank, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin sitting on both of their sides like gargoyles.

"Professor Dumbledore," Draco greeted coolly. "What gives me the privilege to be invited to this meeting?"

He stopped in the middle of the room, looking challengingly at the Headmaster and Head of the Order.

Dumbledore looked amused, while many others were throwing him disgusted glances. Draco didn't care.

"Please sit down, Mr Malfoy."

"Thank you, Sir."

Nevertheless he felt a nagging suspicion which was confirmed a moment later.

Trelawney rose, her eyes blazing behind the thick eyeglasses.

"Professor Dumbledore I demand of you that this … this … that Mr Malfoy is relieved of his post immediately!" Her voice was shrill and loud.

"Explain yourself, Sybil," Dumbledore said mildly.

"He is using Dark Arts! My inner eye had seen this, and it lies never!"

Draco coughed audibly into his hand. Surprised, he noticed the same noise coming from Black and Granger.

Trelawney was now fiery red in the face. But she didn't give up that easily.

"Just look at him!" she squealed.

She pointed at Draco, who only furrowed one brow, staring back coldly.

"Since the start of the term, he looked like a corpse or something, and now he has completely changed! This has to be result of Dark Arts!"

"Well, thanks, Professor Trelawney," Draco answered sweetly. "I never knew that my charm happens to be that intriguing."

Now even Ron Weasley let out a snort of laughter. Harry was grinning from ear to ear. Obviously Draco wasn't the only one who despised Trelawney.

The Divination Professor didn't open her mouth again.

_If looks could kill, it would have spared me the whole Extinguere thing._

"Even if I don't agree with Professor Trelawney's choice of words, she has a point," Lupin broke in. "Do you have an explanation for us, Mr Malfoy?"

"No, Sir. And I don't know what you're talking about," Draco said lightly. The effect of the Extinguere potion had let him forget all cautiousness. "If you just ordered me here to check my health status, I hope I can leave now."

He stood up, but Dumbledore raised his voice again.

"Just another second of your time again, Mr Malfoy."

_Bummer. Well, it could have worked, couldn't it?_

"What?" He turned around unwillingly.

"Just a short question to calm down all members. Whatever happened to you – and do not deny that, we _know _that something happened – can you give us the guarantee that none of the students will be in danger? That their security is granted?"

Draco nodded shortly.

"Yes, Sir."

He turned and left the room, the door banging shut. Dumbledore's last words had infuriated him to no end, even if he knew the Headmaster had all rights to ask such a question.

Somebody bumped into him when strode along the corridor, deep in angry thoughts.

"My, Weasley. Is it a habit for you, knocking me out?"

Ginny reddened.

"What are you doing here, anyway?" Something dawned on him. "You weren't eavesdropping, were you?"

She reddened even more.

"No! I was simply … I lost … I … was eavesdropping," she finally capitulated. "How did you know?"

"It's clearly written in your face," Draco said amused. "Now is this the way a well behaved Gryffindor acts?"

Ginny got angry.

"No, it's the way somebody acts when nobody spills anything!"

Draco had an answer in tow when the door opened again, and the other members started to leave the secret room, at first Mr and Mrs Weasley.

"Oh no!" Ginny paled alarmingly. "Mum will kill me!"

She searched desperately for a place to hide.

Draco knew this corridor, and he also knew another secret spot. He shoved Ginny backwards.

"In there! They will think we met willingly!"

Hidden in the small alcove, they watched the other people disappear. As a result of the tiny space, Ginny was very close to him, he could smell a hint of perfume, something like forget-me-not.

"Are they gone?" Ginny whispered, shifting a little so that her torso was pressed into his back as she tried to look over his shoulder.

"Uh – not yet." Abruptly he snapped out. "I mean, yes they are."

She breathed a sigh of relief and stepped out of the shadows.

"That was close. Thank you, Malfoy."

"I didn't do that for you," he answered harshly. "Can you imagine what would have happened if they saw us together?"

She rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry, your Highness."

"Watch your mouth," he warned. "I can still deduct house points from you!"

"How would you do that?" she answered sweetly. "It would be embarrassing for you, to explain why, now wouldn't it?"

"Shove – off!" he hissed.

"Gladly!"


	9. Sometimes they come back

_Sometimes they come back_

During the following months, Draco went back to his old self, or better said, to a whole new one. He _was _still Draco Malfoy, but that didn't mean he couldn't change a little bit if he wanted to – and he had.

He had been at Crestville House twice, and there was absolutely nothing special about it. Lupin must be round the bend, but if he insisted on buying it – Draco would gladly sell it. He wasn't to keen to keep it, it was reminding him too much of Malfoy Manor.

The days had become longer, and in the middle of April it was very warm outside, very unusual for Britain. Draco wasn't a friend of such heat and he holed up in the dungeon more so than usual. Still, he hadn't a clue what to do after Hogwarts, and he tried not to think over that too much.

To the surprise of many people, he often sat together with Chloe Sinistra. Astronomy hadn't been one of his favorites, but the older woman – a former Ravenclaw – had a dry sense of humor and a first-class memory. There was very little she didn't know, and on top of that – she couldn't stand Trelawney either. Both of them had obviously had some fights in the past, because Sinistra took her subject matter very seriously, and Divination was complete rubbish to her. Well, she didn't say it that bluntly, but it had sounded out.

One evening somebody knocked on the door to Draco's private rooms.

Draco lifted his head up unwillingly from a book.

"Do I have a sign at the door _Please disturb me_? In!"

"Haven't you read that book ten times ?" Sinistra wore her evening robes.

Draco moaned.

"I told you, Chloe, I'm absolutely not in the mood to accompany you!"

Sinistra had pressed him to go with her to Hogsmeade since days ago. Almost half of the school would be there this evening, the Weird Sisters were having a concert. Alone this thought made him shiver – he hated this kind of music.

In Sinistra's opinion, he spent too much time alone. Obviously she had resolved to overtake the part of his mother substitute. Basically he was amused over that, but in moments like this he could have abandoned it gladly.

"No arguing. I will stay here until you finally give up and come with me. You have to get out eventually, or in the near future your teeth will grow and you'll start sucking blood."

"Ha, ha. Don't you have anybody else to bother?"

"No," Sinistra answered dryly. "So? Hurry up!"

"Oh well, I will surrender to shear violence. But only under one condition: I don't have to listen to that wailing they call singing! The ladies are horrible, even Peeves sings better!"

"Promise."

* * *

The other Hogwarts students were already on their way.

Draco and Professor Sinistra got some curious looks, but as they weren't the only teachers going to Hogsmeade, they didn't attract too much attention. Dumbledore had assigned McGonagall and Flitwick to place an eye on the students. Only the Fourth Years and up were allowed to go. The danger of Voldemort had been eliminated, but one couldn't be too careful.

Draco watched a small group a little bit more intently and rolled his eyes. Potter! Wasn't he safe from him in any place?

Sinistra had followed his glance and shook her head slightly.

"Still the old rivalry? You'll never grow up, Draco."

"I think I heard that somewhere before," he muttered.

"You should hear it ten times a day. It's really childish."

"Can we change the subject? It goes on my nerves."

Sinistra just sighed.

"Oh no, here they are, the Banshees of Horror. Chloe, please, let's take off!"

* * *

Not all students had decided to listen to the concert, so the Three Broomsticks was already filled with people. To Draco's regret Potter, Weasley and Granger sat at one of the front tables, Ginny in tow.

The "Dream-Team" stared at him; they wouldn't have reckoned with him in the company of Professor Sinistra. Ginny on the other hand smiled slightly at him.

He nodded shortly back. It was the last thing he needed, to have Ron Weasley breathing down his neck because he had been friendly to his little sister.

Sinistra and Draco sat down in the background. From there, one was able to watch the whole pub, but wasn't seen by the others.

Right next to them, a whole table of girls sat, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, Fifth Years. They hadn't notice the appearance of Draco and Sinistra, their giggling was much too loud for that.

"Did you hear that," a dark-haired Ravenclaw said. "Snape will return to his lessons next term."

"Really?" another one asked. "How did you come to know?"

"I heard some Slytherins talking about it."

"What a pity," a third one chirped in. "I really loved Potions with Malfoy. His … uh, lessons are much more interesting!"

"His lessons?" the Dark-haired one mocked. "Or Malfoy himself? When you stare at him, one would really think he will turn into a candy cane right on the spot."

Draco choked heavily on his ale and started to cough with all his might, laughing. Sinistra patted his back, but she too laughed loudly.

The girls had abruptly turned in their direction. The Ravenclaw who had made the comment went scarlet .

"Professor … Professor Malfoy," she stuttered. The other girls were looking like deer caught in the headlights.

"I fear I have to disappoint you," Draco managed to get out. "I don't have the intention of turning myself into sweets any time soon."

"Uh … we …" The girls almost toppled over each other while fleeing.

Chloe Sinistra watched Draco highly amused.

"Candy cane?"

"Please, I'd prefer a bar of chocolate," Draco answered in the most-likely snobbish Malfoy voice.

Sinistra started to laugh again.

"How interesting, isn't it?"

"Stop it, Chloe, they're not my age, and I'm still teaching."

"Any idea what you want to do afterwards?"

"Nope. None."

Their conversation drifted to other topics, and he was glad.

Nobody had noticed how dark it had gotten outside suddenly. Until ….

"Ouch!" Draco dropped his glass and took a hold at his left arm. "That can't be!" The Dark Mark was burning.

Across the room he could see Potter, both hands pressed to his face – the scar.

"Draco? What is it?" Sinistra's voice was strained.

"The Mark. It's calling for me."

"Impossible. Voldemort is dead!"

"Didn't we think that before? Quick, let's go outside."

Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley were bombarding Harry with questions, too. He looked up when Draco and Sinistra passed their table.

"You too?" It was more a statement than a question.

Draco nodded impatiently.

"Hurry up. We better …." He couldn't finish his sentence, because screams erupted outside. And a noise was starting, like houses were being ripped to shreds with brutal force.

The students started to panic and tried to leave the pub immediately.

"Silence!" Sinistra bellowed. "You're safe here for now! We'll go out and see what's happening, you'll all stay here!"

Draco, Harry, Ron, Ginny and Hermione were already outside, staring shocked at the events. Something like an enormous thunderstorm cloud was floating over Hogmeade's main street, and inside the cloud was a huge pair of glowing red eyes. Manical laughter sounded up. Fleeing people were hit by lightning, burning them on the spot. Dementors too were visible, making everybody shiver. And many other dark creatures had appeared.

Somebody bumped heavily into Draco. It was McKinley, eyes wide and unseeing, and he had a strong nosebleed.

"What happened?"

McKinley didn't answer, full of panic he tried to get his arm loose.

"ANGUS!" Draco yelled. "WHAT HAPPENED!"

"They … they came out of nowhere! They're attacking everyone! Everyone!"

Ron and Harry were staring in his direction, but Draco had understood all too well. Again, he shook the Slytherin fiercely.

"Did you know about the attack? Did _anybody _know? Answer me!"

McKinley shook his head.

Aurors apparated now into Hogsmeade, followed by Professor Dumbledore and the rest of the staff. The Dementors aimed at them directly.

Again the laughter erupted. It was so loud they had to press their hands over their ears.

"Careful!" Hermione yelled and pulled Ginny aside. The building next to her was burning and started now to collapse. There had to be enormous power in the lightning. A few Aurors tried to put out the fire with their wands, but it seemed useless.

"Bring the students out of the Three Broomsticks!" Ron roared. "If that thing …."

It was too late. Again a lightning bolt shot up, hitting the pub, and it started to burn immediately.

Draco let go of McKinley and hurled himself back into the pub.

"Malfoy, don't be silly, come back!"

Together with the other Aurors, the three Gryffindors tried to fight the fire. The air was full of smoke, and screams. Draco had managed to fight his way inside and helped a pale Sinistra to shove out the students as fast as possible. Madam Rosmerta helped them, too.

During the chaos, nobody had noticed Ginny following Draco inside the Three Broomsticks. Draco sensed somebody grabbing his arm.

"What?" he hissed.

"Over there!" Ginny gesticulated hectically at the back wall. A Dementor had infiltrated the pub and was now threatening three girls who were hiding in the corner. Draco recognized the black-haired Ravenclaw from earlier.

"_Expecto patronum_," he shouted simultaneous with Ginny, and the creature hissed when the both silver Patronus' hit it. Then it vanished without a trace.

Ginny hurled to the shaking girls and pulled them to the door.

"We have to get out of here!" she screamed, but Draco had stopped dead in his tracks.

At the spot where the Dementor had stood just seconds ago, a small cloud was forming, similar to the one outside. Voldemort stepped out of the cloud, his eyes darting over to the Slytherin triumphantly.

Draco felt his knees weaken. This was impossible!

Voldemort moved his thin lips, but no tone was hearable. Then he slid over to the frozen Draco, in almost snake-like glides.

"Malfoy!" Ginny yelled and slapped him in the face. That awakened him from his numbness, but Voldemort had now had reached his goal. He stepped closer … and stepped right through Ginny and Draco.

It felt like ice-water, and both gasped. As suddenly as the figure had appeared, it disappeared in front of their eyes.

A voice raised, barely able to be understood, a tired whispering.

"_Xanthu." _And, once more: "_Xanthu." _Nothing came in tow.

"Did you … did you hear that?" Draco croaked.

Ginny nodded silently.

Both had forgotten the danger they were in. But as some burning planks were hitting the carpet next to them, they snapped out of their shock.

"Hurry up!"

It was the literally last second, because after them, the pub crumbled down.

The enormous cloud had disappeared, and with it all the Dementors and the other dark creatures. It was like they had never existed, but the demolition of Hogsmeade was showing the truth.

"Ginny!" Ron took her by the shoulders and started to shake her. "Are you all right? What the fuck were you thinking, running into the pub like that!"

"I'm okay, stop fussing over me!" Ginny said annoyed.

Now all of Ron's fury was aimed at Draco.

"You should have stopped her, Malfoy! She wasn't supposed to be in there!"

Draco stepped back, his eyes narrowing.

"Just for your information, your sister is a grown up, and without her help we couldn't have rescued the last three girls, now do me a favor and shut your damn trap!"

Ron wanted to answer on an instant, but Hermione held him back.

"Ron! Do you really think this is the right time to quarrel with Malfoy? Let's find out what happened!"

The other teachers had summoned the frightened students and inhabitants of Hogsmeade around them. Aurors were patrolling the half destroyed village, to find any survivors or retrieve the dead.

Dumbledore's glance fell upon the small group and winked at them to get closer. His normally friendly blue eyes were flashing, and he looked like he was boiling with anger.

"The Order of the Phoenix is meeting in two hours at Hogwarts," he said shortly. "Mr Malfoy, Miss Weasley, I would like you too to attend."

"Yes, Sir."

"Help us to bring the students back to Hogwarts. The wounded will be brought by the aurors to the hospital wing. Doctors from St Mungos are on their way. Is any of you hurt?"

The five just shook their heads, and followed Dumbledore's orders.

* * *

The Order was completely convened. Mrs Weasley immediately hurled herself to at both her children, she had to check them from head to toe to see if there was something wrong with them. Afterwards Harry and Hermione were examined closely, too. A deathly pale Sirius Black stood next to her and didn't let Harry out of his eyes.

Draco sat down quietly next to Chloe. He was still numb because of the events.

"Is everything all right with you, Draco?" Sinistra asked worriedly.

"If I said yes I would be lying," he managed to get out and fell into a dreary silence again.

Even Snape appeared after some time, and sat down next to Draco. His normally ice cold black eyes were blazing.

The terror of the events was hanging heavily in the room, and it was very silent.

Dumbledore rose.

"I do not know what to say," he finally said, and his voice was strained. "We all thought Voldemort was finally dead for good. Obviously we were mistaken, and this mistake has cost over thirty people's lives, nineteen of which were students. More than double that number of wounded are being attended to."

He remained silent for a moment.

"Some members," he continued, "were from the beginning located at Hogsmeade. Did any of you notice something we should know?"

Harry opened his mouth, bus before he had the chance to say something, Trelawney stood up.

"Why don't you ask him?" she said with a shrill voice, and pointed to Draco who was staring at her unbelievingly.

Sinistra shot up.

"What's the meaning of this, Sybill?"

"We have two former Death Eaters under us. Professor Snape hadn't been in the condition to appear in Hogsmeade. But how about Draco Malfoy? As far as I know, it's the first time he appeared in Hogsmeade since he came here. And immediately the catastrophe breaks out!"

Draco wanted to jump up, but Snape's hand held him down mercilessly.

Dumbledore's glance was severe.

"If you are suggesting such a thing, Sybill, you need to have proof."

"I _saw _it!" she said bossily.

A furious hiss answered her. Ginny Weasley had stood up from her chair and was staring at Trelawney, her eyes spitting dragon fire.

"How _dare _you!" she said in an ice cold voice, she was again reveling Snape.

Ron stared at his sister as if she had grown a second head. Mr Weasley was close to grabbing his daughter, but she threw him a look, and he sighed. Molly's eyes had widened in shock.

"I suggest you listen to our story first instead of attacking someone just because you don't like him! I know it would be the satisfaction of your life if Draco would be the agitator, but it's not true!"

"I think I misheard!" Trelawney hissed back.

"Ladies!" Dumbledore broke up the argument.

Ginny kept standing, both arms entwined before her breast, her glance still hard.

"Even if I am certainly not attending to Miss Weasley choice of words, she is right. Professor Trelawney I might point out to you that there is no reason or proof to inculpate Mr Malfoy."

Trelawney looked furious.

Draco couldn't believe she was accusing him without a trace of a proof and clenched his teeth audibly.

Sinistra and Snape exchanged a look.

"Can we go back to the events now? Harry, you tried to say something."

Harry cleared his throat.

"Well, my scar had hurt, like in the past. And I think …." He threw Draco a short glance, who was nodding shortly, "the Dark Mark on Malfoy's arm was burning too."

Trelawney again made a fierce movement, but McGonagall's icy stare prevented her from opening her mouth.

"There was another thing, Sir," Ginny said quietly.

Immediately everybody looked in her direction. The battlesome expression had vanished from her face, and she shook slightly. Involuntarily, her eyes sought Draco's.

"Miss Weasley?"

"When we were in the pub, there had been a Dementor. Dra … I mean Mr Malfoy and I fought him with the Patronus, and he vanished into thin air. Then … Voldemort materialized and .. and …."

She swallowed.

"He went right through us," Draco continued for her. The memory made his blood run cold again. "It felt like a shower of ice cold water, and the Voldemort creature disappeared, too."

Dumbledore had lifted his head, blue eyes thoughtful.

"Anything else?"

Again Ginny and Draco exchanged a look.

"Yes, Sir. I know it sounds ridiculous, but a voice whispered the word _Xanthu. _I could hear it, but rather in my head than with my ears."

Ginny nodded.

"Same here," she said.

The thoughtful expression in the old man's face had deepened.

"Xanthu?"

"Yes, Sir."

"What's the meaning of that, Albus?" Professor McGonagall asked.

"I am not sure, Minerva. We have to analyze that later. The ministry has to be informed, and for the time being we have to conjure stronger security fields. Nobody is allowed to leave Hogwart's grounds. And we have to identify the dead and inform their families."

"And … if it's really Voldemort again?" Remus Lupin asked quietly.

"Then we have to fight him again, Remus."

Dumbledore looked very old.

"Has anybody something to add? No one? The Meeting is over than."

Without another word, he turned and left the room. Deep silence followed him.


	10. Kisses and other difficulties

_Kisses and other difficulties_

Draco sat on the highest outer wall of Hogwarts and stared into the night. He wasn't able to sleep, and he was positive nobody else could either. From his spot on the wall, he had a clear view of the Great Hall and could see it was filled with people, despite the late hour – it was about 3 am.

Fear was lying over the castle. Many of the younger students had to get a sleeping charm from Madam Pomfrey, because a lot of them had been hysterical. Draco understood, his feelings were almost mutual.

Voldemort was back again? But was he really? A lot of facts were pointing in that direction, but on the other hand , a lot weren't. First, that wasn't Voldemort's style at all. Second, the strange disappearing of the Dementor, the appearing of Voldemort out of the cloud – and third the strange voice ….

After the meeting, Snape had vanished once more into his rooms again, and Sinistra and Draco had followed him. Both teachers had been very angry about Trelawney's assumptions.

Draco himself had told them the events in more details because Snape had asked him to. But even his former Head of House who was normally able to see things before they happened was clueless.

Draco fidgeted around on the cold stone and closed his eyes. He almost toppled down the wall in shock when somebody spoke to him.

"Weasley! Don't you dare sneak up on me like that!"

"Sorry." Ginny's voice sounded exhausted.

"What are you doing here anyway, in the middle of the night?"

"I could ask you the same." She balanced over the wall and sat down next to him. "You can't sleep either, right?"

"Looks like it."

Ginny sighed and pushed a strand of thick red hair behind her ear.

"Do you think it will happen again?"

"What the hell do you think I am? The new Divination teacher?" he asked huffily, and sighed too. "Sorry, I didn't want to snap at you. I simply don't know, Ginny. But I have a foreboding of something very, very bad."

Ginny was silent a moment.

"Me too," she murmured. In the moonlight he could see thin traces of tears running down her cheeks. "It's just … so many dead … and so many our age or even younger …."

Draco had the sudden urge to pull her into his arms, but he suppressed it.

"I know."

They sat together silently, each one deep in their own thoughts.

"How did you know how to find me?" he asked finally.

"I didn't. I came here to be alone for a moment, then I saw you sitting on the wall."

She looked down over the Hogwarts's grounds, bathed in moonshine. The lake was glittering mysteriously, and an illusory peace had spread.

"I have to thank you," said Draco, looking anywhere but at her.

"Me? Why?"

"Trelawney …."

A snort erupted from Ginny.

"Rubbish. She could have also blamed Harry, Ron or Hermione, they too had been in Hogsmeade. That woman has lost her marbles," she said bluntly, and reddened after it, he could see it even in the moonlight. "McKinley addressed me, some time ago."

Abruptly Draco turned his head.

"What did he want?"

"You won't believe it, but he apologized."

"Angus McKinley?" Draco said unbelievingly. "Are you sure we're speaking about the same person?"

A small smile appeared on her face.

"Positive. Obviously it had shocked him to no end that he was attacked too. He said it was a vampire."

"I thought I saw some. Actually it's strange, right? I mean, nobody was bitten. And the Dementors – they spread fear and terror, but nobody was kissed either. The only ones thing really doing the harming were those lightning bolts."

"Yeah. You know what I'm thinking? It looks like an enormous illusion," Ginny said after another short pause.

"You could be right. I just hope Dumbledore will be able to find out what's behind the word Xanthu."

"Yes." She sighed. "Actually, this night is almost meant for a romantic walk or heavy snogging, and everybody just thinks of murder, terror and fear."

"Isthat an invitation?" Draco asked dryly, despite the fact that he wasn't really sure if he was joking or not.

She answered with something that nearly catapulted him down the wall.

"And if the answer is a yes?"

"Ginny …."

"Forget it," she said abruptly. "I'm not myself tonight."

She tried to stand up, but Draco grabbed her wrist and pulled her down again. Then he pressed his lips on hers.

_Draco what the fuck are you doing! This is the worst point of time , this is a Weasley and on top of that your student!_

Ginny opened her mouth, winding her hands behind his neck and their tongues started to duel. Draco felt her soft lips touching him and simply told his inner voice to shut up. He started to feel hot and he could have sworn that the temperature outside seemed to have jumped at least twenty degrees.

Draco explored her mouth thoroughly. His hand traveled to one of her breasts, squeezing a nipple through the fabric lightly. Ginny moaned quietly in his mouth, her own hand touching his crotch, massaging his growing erection steadily. He slipped his fingers under her blouse, touching the warm flesh underneath.

Draco was about to open her bra when somebody coughed in the background.

They stopped kissing and turned around, Ginny busy straightening her clothes.

Hermione looked in another direction, but she had a stern expression on her face.

"Ginny, your mother is asking for you."

"Coming," Ginny said, not in the least embarrassed. "See you, Draco." With that, she vanished down the stairs.

Draco had to grin. She wasn't quite the shy, innocent girl he had imagined, but that made her even more attractive.

"Well?" Hermione said icily. "You have anything to say, Malfoy?"

"I don't think I have to justify myself in front of you, Granger," he answered coolly and stood up.

Hermione laid her head to one side and watched him with one of her most stinging looks.

"Maybe not in front of me," she said, demonstratively slowly. "But Mr and Mrs Weasley, not to mention Ginny's brothers, would be very happy to learn about your point of view, don't you think? _Professor _Malfoy?"

"Is this a threat?"

"No, it's just a warning. Leave Ginny alone, or you'll regret it, I promise."

"Ginny can speak for herself ." Draco smirked. "And it's her decision – not yours. Not Potters. Not mine. Hers."

"Ginny has a crush on you, so what? You are cold as ice, Malfoy. You would never fall in love with a Weasley. It's the perfect chance for you to get back at us."

"Really? Tell you what, Miss Genius. _You _are the one blabbering about _people can change, everyone has a right to make his own decisions, _bla bla bla. But your wisdom doesn't count for Slytherins, and especially not for me, am I right?"

Hermione was pale with anger.

"I repeat, Malfoy. Hands off Ginny!"

With that, she turned and stomped down the stairs.

_Well done, Draco. You just dug your own grave. Congratulations_.

* * *

Classes were cancelled the next day. In the Great Hall, while almost fully occupied, lasted the same silence as that at the Order meeting yesterday. 

Dumbledore hadn't appeared for breakfast, and nobody spoke.

At many tables there were people missing, and a lot of the girls had tear-stained eyes.

Draco himself was just picking at his breakfast, like everybody else. When he lifted his head, he was very aware of Granger's threatening stare. She had stayed overnight, together with Potter, Ron Weasley, Sirius Black and the Weasleys, on McGonagall's request.

A few times he also could sense Ginny's glance, but he didn't look in her direction. Draco knew Hermione would hold her promise to spill out in front of the Weasleys if he showed any signs of interest.

And maybe Hermione wasn't wrong. It would be better for all of them to forget everything that had happened. A relationship with Ginny wouldn't work anyway, there was too much between them.

And just casual sex? For that, the risk was far too high. He would have given into the temptation if it wasn't for Dumbledore who had done everything to keep him here at Hogwarts, against all odds. But that wasn't everything, right?

_You like her. A lot. Casual sex wouldn't work with her._

When the owls arrived, a true storm was unleashed. Almost every parent had written to their children, wanting to know if they were okay and what had happened.

Draco got an owl, too, sent by the Ministry. He examined it suspiciously. From the corner of his eyes he saw Ginny had gotten one too.

"What is that?" Sinistra asked quietly.

"A summons. I have to give evidence." He wasn't feeling too well.

"You don't have to worry about that."

"You know, I know, but does Fudge know, too?"

He left the table without looking back.

* * *

"Draco, wait!" 

He was on his way to the Dungeons when he heard Ginny's hurried footsteps behind him.

"What?" he said harshly.

"We need to talk."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't you dare lie to me, Draco Malfoy! You know exactly what I'm talking about!"

He looked around carefully, and pulled her along behind him.

"It was a one-off, and that's all, clear?" he said after closing the door to his private chambers behind them.

"Nothing is clear! Is it Hermione?"

"Damn, Weasley, it's not only Granger! Maybe I have to spell it out for you, but I am your teacher, and you're still my student! You should really think about the consequences. I could be fired!"

"You of all people are worried about that?" She was watching him unbelievingly, and he got angrier.

"What do you mean me_ of all people_! It's over, so far as it concerns me!"

Ginny was silent a long moment, but in her blazing eyes he could see that it wasn't over for her, not by a long shot.

"To answer that," she said after some time. "First, I'm legally an adult. Second, I leave Hogwarts soon, and third in three months you aren't a teacher anymore. You are talking about a lot of reasons why it wouldn't work, but none of that is addressing me personally."

"I don't see your point."

"I'm getting to that, if you want to continue playing dumb. Was it simply a challenge for you, after I spoke that silly sentence out? You had your tongue very deep down my throat in consideration of what happened yesterday in Hogsmeade. And I _heard _what you told Hermione, I stayed on the staircase."

She would have been better off not saying that, because Draco was seeing red now. He grabbed her shoulder and shook her fiercely.

"Stop that, Weasley! It's not you! I don't care about damn Granger or your family, but I have enough other troubles! Voldemort's fucking _Infinitus Flamma_ …."

Like a lightning bolt, the well known pain shot up in his body. He let go of Ginny, fell down to his knees and screamed.

"Draco, what … Draco, what's wrong with you? Should I get Madam Pomfrey? Heavens, speak to me!"

"Not … Pomfrey," he managed to get out and clenched his teeth. He sensed the rest of Extinguere working against the curse, but it wasn't enough.

He realized Ginny sitting on her knees next to him, watching him worriedly with her chocolate brown eyes.

"Help me up."

Together they managed to bring him up again.

"What happened? And what's an _Infinitus Flamma_?" she asked hesitantly. Then her eyes widened. "Voldemort hexed you?"

Draco had no choice, and he knew it.

"Sit down. I'll tell you, but first you have to promise me something."

"And what would that be?"

"Don't tell anybody. _Ever_."

"But …."

"No buts, promise me. My life depends on it."

"Okay, I promise. Tell me. Please."

The whole story took more time that Draco would have imagined. Ginny proved once more her that she was able to add two and two, and she asked good and mature questions when he tried to leave things out. At the end she was pale and thoughtful.

"And now?" she asked finally. "What to do now? If I understood correctly, you should take that potion as soon as possible, right?"

"It would be fine if I was able to, but I'm not. It knocks me out for about twenty-four hours, it's the middle of the week, and I have to appear at the Ministry tomorrow."

"Yeah, me too." She silenced again. "Is it very bad?" she asked then, quietly.

Draco was close to lying but her, but found that he simply couldn't.

"It was worse before," he answered. "But the hex doubled, I feel it in every bone. And when the last of the Extinguere is used, I won't be able to cope anymore."

"Classes won't continue until next week, I heard McGonagall and Flitwick talk about it. What if you report yourself sick? I mean, after you come back from the Ministry?"

"Chloe and Severus will insist on sending me to the hospital wing. I can't. I have to wait until the weekend." He paled at that thought.

"It's my fault," Ginny said miserably.

"Bullshit. I should have just shut my big mouth. But I was so angry with you, I simply … well, you saw it. Ginny, I … I like you. Really. But it isn't working, not right now."

_I bet she'll break out in laughter. I mean, it's pathetic to hear that out of my own mouth._

She went forward, kissing him slightly on the lips. Ignoring the pain in his body and his words before, he took the opportunity to slip into her mouth with his tongue, pulling her onto his lap. She tasted wonderful, and her tongue was meeting his own with an equally fierce desire.

"But it _is_ working right now isn't it?" she murmured, when he left her mouth to suck on her neck, leaving hickeys. "Draco …."

She moaned when he hit the sensitive spot behind her ear, and he licked over it rapidly, forgetting everything but her. He wanted to take her, pain or no, right here on the floor, to fuck her senseless.

A knocking on the door disrupted them effectively.

Ginny muttered something under her breath, clearly annoyed, and Draco's feelings were mutual. They let go of each other, straightening their clothes.

"If this is Granger, I'm fucked," Draco murmured grimly. "Ready?"

Ginny nodded.

It was Sinistra.

"May I talk to you for a moment?" she asked, stopping when she saw that he was not alone.

Her glance wandered from Draco to Ginny, their clothes in slight disarray, and Ginny had pulled up the collar of her blouse.

"I am sorry, I didn't know you had a _guest_." A hint of sarcasm was in her voice.

"Miss Weasley was already on her way out."

Ginny nodded reluctantly.

"Okay. Bye."

She left the room.

Sinistra sat down at his desk, her fingers drumming on the top.

"Chloe, if you want to say anything, do it. Otherwise I would prefer to be alone now."

"Do you really think I'm dense, Draco? Do you ever think before you do something? And with _whom_?"

"I know exactly what I'm doing," he said coldly, even though he knew the older woman had every right to lecture him.

Sinistra rolled her eyes, but astonishingly she changed the topic.

"Your appointment at the Ministry tomorrow. Professor Dumbledore demands that you will be accompanied by two other people during the summons."

"You, and who else?"

But Sinistra shook her head.

"No. He decided to send Remus Lupin and Hermione Granger with you."

"What!" He looked at her, stunned. "Them, of all people! Granger _hates _me, she won't move a single finger to help me!"

"Obviously the Headmaster has another opinion."

"Lovely. Do you have anymore of this excellent news for me?"

"Professor Dumbledore asked you to come to his office immediately. He wants to talk to you."

_Will this never stop?

* * *

_

"Headmaster."

Draco addressed Dumbledore curtly.

Dumbledore sat behind his desk, the Phoenix Fawkes sitting in front of him. The man still looked so much older than two days before.

"Thank you for your fast appearance, Mr Malfoy. Do sit down."

"Is it because of the Ministry?"

"Yes and no. I have to ask you strongly to keep your temperament in check at the summons. I saw yesterday how you reacted to Professor Trelawney's words, and it worries me. Fudge will register every bagatelle to use it against you."

"So Trelawney isn't the only one who blames me for the attacks?"

Dumbledore played with one of the bird's feather and didn't look up.

"I fear the answer is no."

Draco had to swallow at that.

"Who else?" he asked flatly.

"Many parents demanded of me to release you immediately. Many of them simply don't trust you, and the rumors about your mysterious illness has not helped matters in the least."

"And what do you think I should do now?"

"I refuse to release you," Dumbledore stated. "But please take this warning very earnestly. You know Fudge is in a position to make your live a living hell."

_More so than it is now?_

"Is that all?"

"For now, yes. I hope you will remember my words."


End file.
